used – ta – could

there was a time
i could pretend
it was the way
things should be
big brother
teaching me
how it was
to be all growed up

i got to hang out
with him and his friends
and maybe be rewarded
with ice cream
or candy
if i didn’t scream
or cry

and that’s how big-brother-love was

after the first time
when i was beat
by our father
when i tried to tell

big boys don’t tattle

it’s weird
but as painful
as horrible as things were
i knew what to expect

any more
i’m lucky if i know
what day it is
and there really isn’t
much to look forward to

sometimes
i miss the days
that i use-ta-could
accept …

no

pretend to accept

my life

4 thoughts on “used – ta – could

  1. Hi Marcus, I hope you are feeling better and are busy looking for those silver linings. The ones most folks look for are winning a jack-pot of good fortune, but those are short-lived. I’d rather look for the ones that give strength and just the joy of being alive. You are not responsible for the things that have given you heartache, and though it isn’t easily recognized the best way to get it out of mind is to forgive. Try it on for size and bless you in the coming days. Marie

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Marcus
    You had many followers enjoy this post. So I’ll know, did you receive my 2 emails sent to private em? Both were a week or so ago. If you didn’t get it feels much better than hearing back.
    Have a great holiday.
    M

    Like

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