if you say you like me
it will be discounted
because you don’t know me
if you compliment me
it will be ignored
because you can’t be serious
and therefore must be trying to humiliate me
the only people who try to get close
are those who wish to hurt me
and thus cannot be trusted
i will no longer be fooled
by the smiling face
or kind words
and, if after reading this
you still try
it proves your insincerity
so don’t try
i am tired
of dodging bullets
This is sad.:-(
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Omg! That was exactly what came to my mouth after reading this “this is so sad”. ❤❤❤
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I agree, Deb .
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Appearance is a type of reality though. I appreciate this person who’s presented to us through your blog at the very least.
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Thank you, my friend.
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Frist, let me say: I truly love your writing. You paint emotions and pain in your writing. Some writers can string aslong pretty words together. You get below the skin and into the heart.
And you are correct, only the people close to us can hurt us.
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That’s a sneaky way to work in a compliment … not sure how to handle that one.
🙂
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lol
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I know this feeling…and then I decided that I was not going to let the evil of a few destroy my chances. I am learning to trust myself … hope you find your way there too.
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You nailed it – first step – trust myself. There are places I don’t think I’m there yet.
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The simple response is self-forgiveness, but I know it’s not that easy. Try recognizing that you are more mature now, and have that benefit on your side. I admire your courage and willingness to talk about this.
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“more mature now” … LOL – ok, I suppose I should own that one…
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Well, it seems you’ve put me in a bind. Tell you what I think you need to hear and risk being labeled insincere or say nothing at all and feed your loneliness.
So, I choose to stay in the middle and stand by you.
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🙂
Wisdom. Thanks for being there.
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You’re most welcome 🙂
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You’re smart enough to know insincerity; you’re also smart enough to move past it. Your writing is for YOU! It makes no sense to let others impact your life unless you choose to accept their words. Be prepared, however, for ongoing compliments. Your words come from a place many are unwilling and fearful to go. People will interpret this as courageous. Courageous people receive compliments whether they seek them or not. Look at the decorated military war veterans. They’re called “HEROES” and are often repulsed by the word. Interesting dichotomy of emotions.
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I can understand the repulsion to ‘hero’. That would be enough to get me to think about moving to a new blog. Or quit altogether. ‘Courageous’ and/or ‘smart’ – I can deal with those simply by ignoring them. Unless a person gets extreme in their insistence, which of course just increases the level of distrust.
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