Finding peace of mind is becoming more and more difficult. Daily my mind shifts from the pains of the past to the uncertainty of the future.
Yes, I still have the memories and the flashbacks that tear apart my soul and leave me feeling empty and alone. But I can still (usually) set that aside as the past. Yes, it happened. Yes it was terrifying. And yes, it can still bring me straight up out of bed crying.
But November. That is my future. The future of everyone I know and care about.
And November is terrifying.