just label me certifiable

I was scheduled for an MRI on my shoulder at 6:40 this morning.  Since that’s a time I’m normally arriving at work, the hour wasn’t really an issue.  I’ve done MRI’s before, and with breathing and relaxation they’re not a BAD problem.

That being said – for the shoulder they have a molded plastic “immobilizer” that slips over the shoulder.  That upped the pain (to say the least).  THEN I had to turn the hand palm up – VERY uncomfortable and unnatural — so they strap the arm down snug to keep it from moving or me turning the palm inward.

Claustrophobia is an issue with my past and all – I know that.  Had I known they were going to half immobilize me, I would have suggested sedation.

All this to say the MRI did not take place.  I lost it MAJORLY.  And that was before they slid me into the stupid tube.  Once I was further confined in the tube I was gone.  Full panic mode.  Or close to — no tears, screaming, or threatening.

I have requested sedation so we can reschedule the MRI.  The only good thing from this morning is they refunded my copay.

Sometimes I can be such a wuss!!

😦

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12 thoughts on “just label me certifiable

  1. That’s not being a wuss. Having an MRI is scary. The only time I ever had an MRI, I pushed the emergency button after two minutes and I was out of there. The nurse said it’s pretty common for people to freak out. It doesn’t mean you have claustrophobia, just that no sane person wants to be shoved into a tube, it just doesn’t feel right. If you need to have an MRI I would definitely suggest sedation and maybe headphones if they’re allowed.

    Liked by 1 person

    • unfortunately I do have claustrophobia – it shows up in lots of ways – the MRI is just a major hit. Dr. has agreed to sedation so we try again tomorrow evening. They have headphones, but we didn’t even get that far. So – fingers & toes crossed for tomorrow.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. You’re not a wuss. Your brain is wired to associate being strapped down and shoved into darkness with trauma. You didn’t run away when they pulled you out of the machine. You negotiated a solution.

    Those of the actions of a man who is taking responsibility for his health and symptoms.

    The wuss is the guy who denies his own pain and needs.

    Like

    • Thanks my friend. I needed to hear that right now. Got some ativan and managed to get thru the test. And then I learn they have what they call “conscious sedation” which is where an anesthesiologist actually gives me an injection to “almost” put me under for the duration. That sure would have been good to know.
      But at any rate, it’s done – now I just wait until Dr. calls back with the results.
      … still feel like a wuss — but at less of one … if that makes any sense.

      Liked by 1 person

      • It makes sense.

        I’m having a ‘wusss’ moment.

        Tomorrow I’m going to see a GP. Something is going on with my body and I’m a little afraid of what it might be.

        I have anxiety attacks that make me lightheaded and breathless…but symptoms normally pass when I’m inside. Recently I find that I’m out of breath just from walking across the room.

        I’m thinking whoa…that’s new.

        I really want this to be more psychopathology — if that makes any sense.

        I have all kinds of worst case scenarios going through my head.

        My point is that being scared is part of being alive…wusses run and hide…they retreat to dogma, blame others for their problems.

        You’re not a wuss and neither am I…:)

        Like

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